I swear every time I see a Smart Car on the road I get a huge urge to crash into it as hard as I can. The Smart Car really is just a dumb vehicle bought by dumb people. How big of an asshole do you have to be to decide you want to drive a Micro Machine for the next little while?
I always think of how fun it would be to bonk into a Smart Car while driving. I picture them sliding all over the road, spinning around in little circles like when you used to hit oil slicks in NES games. I also imagine a descending slide whistle noise while this happens. They just seem like toys that would simply biff off a concrete wall and keep going on their way.
How can you possibly look cool driving a Smart Car? No matter what you always look like a fucking goof. Mr. 31-year-old financial advisor has childhood issues and still hasn't gotten over the day his mom told him he was too big for his Little Tikes car and sold it. So he buys a Smart Car and sucks his thumb and cries himself to sleep every night.
I mean really. It looks like it runs on double A batteries. I wish I had more problems with this car because I'm really stretching here. It's just dinky and stupid looking and I have great fun thinking up awesome ways to destroy them. Like parking it and then having two enormous dump trucks sandwich it on both sides at 80mph. Or drive like 30 of them into the Grand Canyon all at the same time so you just see all these little pieces of crap tumbling into the ravine. That's good stuff, man!
This coming from a guy that drove a Suzuki Swift for 5 years...
You can fit 2 smart cars one parking spot. Meaning if everyone drove a smart car we would need half as many parking lots,which means twice as man parks. would that be a bad thing?
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