Fashion Shit

OK, maybe I'm ignorant, I don't know. If you want to defend fashion shit, be my guest, but for now, here's my take on it.

One question: why does anyone pay attention to this meaningless garbage? Ah hell, here are more questions. Why is there a television channel devoted solely to fashion? Who is watching it? Can we find them a soul?

Why do people need to be told what to wear? Why do they need to be told what's in and what's out this fall season? Are these people insecure? Why do they need to obsess over fashion styles?

Christ, it's clothing. Put a fucking shirt on, go out, and find yourself a job. Fashion flair is not important. Have you seen some of the things these models come out wearing? Some of them come out dressed like peacocks or mermaids or some shit. Seriously, I never see anyone wearing this stuff besides the blank people on the runway. And if I ever did, "stylish and sexy" wouldn't be the first thing that comes to mind. It would be something more like "rich, snotty cunt."

And why do catalogues have massive sections with endless pictures of coats? They're all the same. You've seen them, the perfect smiling family of four wearing their winter coats, tossing fake snow at each other. That's not even reality. Reality would be a picture of the two kids rolling around in the slushy driveway fighting over a DS with half a snow-fort in the background. And dad would be inside watching syndicated episodes of Two and a Half Men while chain smoking Newports.

Back to coats though. You want to know what my coat looks like. Picture a brown, corduroy jacket from 1976 with half the ridges worn away. It has no buttons left and there is a big gash that has grown out of a small hole where one of the buttons used to be. This is pretty much my coat, only mine is way shittier. It truly is the jacket of a homeless man. But I stick by it because...right, it's a fucking coat. It keeps me warm. It's doing it's job. I'm not attempting to impress Her Majesty here.

Stop treating these fashion experts all over the media like they're walking capsules of class and sophistication. They're wasting their time with nonsense and someone needs to find them a real hobby fast.